I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
