im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
