I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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