I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
