I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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