Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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