I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I'm sobbing to NWA
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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