You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
