Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
