If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Randomize
