I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
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