Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Randomize
