Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
