Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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