Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
