I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
She needs sedatives and a leash
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
