Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I want to fling myself into the sun
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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