I love black thongs
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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