so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize