I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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