So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I'm just crazy horny about you
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
