I think i sorta joined a cult last night
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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