btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
