between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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