Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
