Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
