You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
