he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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