Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Randomize
