sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
oh god the rape fog is back!
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I think your dad took our porno
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Randomize
