escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
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