is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize