You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
false alarm, still single
Randomize
