you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
