I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
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