What a fucking waste of an outfit
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
