Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
