so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
