Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Randomize
