Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
