how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
