Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize
