For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize
