look no pants
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
