I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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