He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
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