I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
