we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Randomize
