i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize