Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Randomize
