In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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