You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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